Poppy Seed

So 2011 started with not a whimper but a full blown fit of giddy happiness. I am quite surprised *even though no one else is* at my current set of circumstances. I did want to start the new year with a new post of all the cool and wonderful things I wanted to happen, but I always rush things so I knocked out a couple of those new wonderful things.. and one unexpected big thing already.

Friday, The family went out to check out a school for William. I really would love to have been able to homeschool him, but so much is on my plate right now.. even more so since Thursday that I think he would fair better at least for a year in a really nice small setting with peers. So everything seemed to check out and they can enroll him this semester with out a problem which makes me happy. I never had any issues with this particular school so it will be neat to check them out first hand and see how smoothly it goes. Being a Christian school I was more than a little concerned that we could be perhaps ostracized and or left out of things/being told our belief system was not a good fit for the school. I was pleasantly greeted even after I just upfront asked how they felt about a non christian student/family being a part of their school and how they would treat that situation. So.. one big road block out of the way.

Right now I am in a bitter sweet mood. I want to be jumping up and down but quite honestly I am afraid to move or think. With so much loss last year and new loss this year.. what I found out Thursday was quite a.. awesome yet scary thing.

I have a poppy seed.. or what is the size of a poppy seed growing and making itself at home in my nice warm cushy uterus . And I took 10 pregnancy tests.. showed pictures to Laura to confirm lines.. and posted it on facebook just to make sure everyone could see for themselves and perhaps convince me the line was indeed there and the bulk gross of 200 cheapy tests weren't all fake positives or something else ridiculous in nature.

So.. 4 weeks along says my 7 different baby apps.. which I can't figure out which one I like best so right now I have 7 and counting. I already bought another blanket.. and thinking about what to knit this new little critter or critters according to my mom and some others who like to freak me out.

My boobs are just going to be constantly someone else's for at least the next two more years if not more. I need a bigger bed and to try and transition the oldest to his own ubber bed that I already have picked out from Ashley furniture.

I need to make lists.. doctors appointments.. all that good stuff.. but .. I haven't. From the moment I tested positive...I've been afraid of losing it. I have been cramping on and off this whole week... and it scares me to death. I wanted a baby.. logically though I knew I shouldn't have a baby.. but seeing that little line made me so happy.. I don't know how I would react if my cycle started this week. I want to say well it was bad timing and such.. and it is.. but I really love this poppy seed...already.. and crying just thinking about not having it..

I had plans to get back to my old college weight.. and go out and do more stuff.. but none of that has even phased me.. I just want to sit back drink water, grab my prenatals.. and keep this baby nice and cushy.

My poppy seed.. what a great way to start a new year.

And on top of all of this.. we are getting 3-6 inches of wonderful white soul cleansing snow.... oh yes.. that rubbermaid storage lid is going to be a sled.. and the kids are going to love it.. and if not.. I do.

Namaste
Elizabeth