Both kids are snoozing away so I thought I would get a chance to write about my life here recently.
What's happening/ has happened.. well.. what hasn't happened to me lately. I got to go to the Jimmy Buffet concert spur of the moment.. it was awesome. I finally got to eat at Ribs and Reds ( one of my favorite places to eat at Gulf Shores) Always fantastic food but every time we went for some reason it have been closed due to bad timing/hurricanes.. But we got to go after a somewhat hectic road trip down.
I am glad we got our little mini vacation. I missed my babies dearly and wish they could have come...spur of the moment road trips w/ toddlers= not a good idea. However.. I have been dying to go to a concert and what better than Jimmy Buffet when you need some cheering up. Plus adult conversation.. lots of walking around on the beach.. swimming till 2am .. all that helps too.
I had a great day today.. well it's 1am so technically yesterday. I got to go out to eat with Kevin and the kids before he had to leave ( which is always nice to have some extra time with him) I got to take the kids for a check up with our favorite doctor. I wish he could be my doctor.. I love him I don't know what I am going to do when he retires. We all went swimming at Cricket's ( my grandmother ) and had a marvelous time. Then off to Publix for some awesome deals on school supplies, and after that.. totally worn out.. went to Milo's for a burger and sweet tea.. and the most awesome cheese sandwiches ever for the kids.. All in all.. a fantastic day. And to top it off I got my gift pack from Franklin Goose waiting for me to open when I got home.
Honestly... the fact of the matter is.. I am more the person I want to be on the inside now than I ever have been. I really wish I could lose some weight, but really who doesn't? Even at my thinnest I thought I was huge.. at least now it's the opposite.. I know I am fat but I choose to ignore it and just be happy. I could be hit by a bus tomorrow.. and would I really want to pass up eating a sugar baby melon for breakfast? No.. I don't think so.
Death has been on my mind a lot lately.. and it scares me.. I don't know what happens when we die.. no one really does. I don't want to die.. but I know we will.. and I know concentrating on it for any amount of extended time periods tends to make you crazy. I live differently now.. very cautiously.. absorbing more.. I did before but it was out of depression.... weeping miserably how it all will end.. Now I just.. soak... lovingly in the moment letting it go. ..and warmly caressing the next.
I don't even know what to say about anything...except I am here.. doing the best I can.. I falter..but I am trying.
"Let us then be up and doing
with a heart for any fate..
still achieving still pursuing
Learn to Labor.. and to wait.. "
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