Pregnancy and Childbirth

Buddha baby In his Posh Womb at 26 weeks

There are a lot of things that people won't tell you about pregnancy and childbirth.

Quirks of Pregnancy

* You could end up burping for a whole hour and a half and stay up all night with heartburn.

* Your breasts might just start to leak everywhere.

* When you laugh, cry, or think, you pee yourself.

* You have no control of any emotion or bodily function.

* Brushing your teeth can make you throw up again.

* Your sense of smell is now a 20 mile radius

* You will be the most organized you ever have in your entire life


So organized in fact that I was trying to get to the fridge to eat a mango for breakfast , but on the way there I hit the junk drawer, after that was cleaned , I had to rearrange all the magnets on the fridge before I opened the door. By this time I had forgotten what I went into the kitchen for and decided then to alphabetize my spice rack. Finally, after all that was done my husband walks in and asks if I had breakfast yet, "No, can you get me a mango? "

Childbirth

* Labor is called this for a reason.

* The birthing suite is not where you will be put until they KNOW you are in labor, until then sit for 4 hours in a labor closet with a shared bathroom

* Your water may break, or leak, but it may just explode.

* People won't listen to your birthplan unless you make them.

I didn't even know I was in labor, I just kept cleaning the house and thought maybe I strained my back. Later that evening I started thinking for kicks I would just time it, because obviously this isn't labor because it doesn't hurt that bad. Well, I tell my husband that I am hurting a little bit before we go to bed ( I was 10-15 minutes apart.) I couldn't sleep so 10 minutes later ( now 5 minutes apart) I called my doctor and their response was ," You should have been here when they started to get 10 minutes apart."

My husband who was rudly awakened and still cross for me telling him it wasn't "real" labor, and now that it was he was rushing around trying to find his clothes and mine( I never got the pajama's so I ended up staying in the hospital gown the whole time.) So we get down to the hospital and they put a monitor on me and tell me to stay in this room ( closet) and the doctor will be in in an hour. 4 hours later... They finally tell me that I am in labor, but only 3 cm and in order to get into a room they must administer pitocin. I was in shock.. I didn't want this. But after talking with my husband we decided that I was already in labor it just needed a jumpstart and off it went. They came in to break my water ( again against my birthplan) and before they could I exploded. It felt like I had to push... and then pop my water broke. It was like the weirdest feeling I have ever felt.

I asked for my IV to be administered during a contraction so it wouldn't bother me as much. I am deathly afraid of needles. My epidural was easy compared to the IV. The IV was the worst part of my whole pregnancy and childbirth.

My husband almost missed his child being born because of the people of the ARAB police departement threatening to arrest him. Substory: We had a court date the day our son was born and we were fighting a ticket we had received while in that town. SO... he had to make the 2 hour trip there and back before I hit 10 cm. Needless to say the judge ended up not arresting him and even granting an extention to our case. ( but I was about to unplug my IV and go up there myself I was so angry!)

By the time he was an hour away I was at 10 cm ready to push. My doctor who wasn't even supposed to be there came to the hospital just to see me deliever ( I guess I made quite an impression on him) I DH flew like the wind and 15 minutes later he was at my side and 30 minutes after that our son was born. He didn't cry...he just looked around and was at peace with everything. I finally got to hold my little burrito after his bath and I was just thankful for a perfectly healthy baby boy.

August 28th 2006 12:07pm 6lbs 8 oz. 19inches long